Part 2 of the series 'Women's Tales From the Institute' entitled ‘In Our Own Words’ covers the spoken and written stories of different categories of women and their experiences of conflict as well as the challenges faced. It includes the testimonies of women as told by the women themselves.

In Our Own Words:

Our Experiences as Women

The realities of conflict widows in the Acham district of Nepal were documented by Nisha Gurung highlighting their post conflict socio-economic situation. As single women associated with the death of their husbands, they suffer social exclusion, violence from their husbands’ families and limited options for income generation. A significant portion of these women have also not received government support or recognition.

“Eight years ago there was a cross fire between the Maoists and the security forces; there were some casualties. The husband of this woman was arrested and accused of being a collaborator. He was tortured, he was on the verge of death when he was taken to the hospital and died 9 days later. She has 2 babies and the security forces still harass the woman and accuse her of connections to the Maoists and the community does not treat her the same. They look down upon her and the family accuses her of killing her husband. She doesn’t have a source of income to support her children. There are many other cases such as this when it comes to single women in this district… their stories are undocumented.”

In the girl’s own words, Anita Gateretse and Eleonore Nduwimana shared the story of one of many girls and women trafficked from Bujumbura to Beirut for unpaid hard labour where they suffer grave human rights violations such as recurrent rape, forced pregnancies and abortions, physical assault, denial of medical attention among others. In Burundi, this issue remains a taboo for discussion, largely unrecognized, undocumented and unsatisfactorily addressed by communities, civil society and the justice system.

“I’m Clarissa Kwizera. When I was 11 I was taken to Lebanon. Since I am an orphan and live with my poor grandmother who can’t afford my school fees I took the man’s offer. The network that does this dirty work got papers for us and took us up to Beirut. On arrival we were handed over to 4 women who put us in 1 of their houses to do house chores and serve our mistresses, also sleeping with the boss’ husband. I got pregnant and was taken for a forced abortion where I lost a lot of blood, weight and I’m still suffering from that incident. The father of my mistress pitied me because I was always sick and helped me to escape from that place by talking to Caritas.”

While documenting the cases of discrimination experienced by women with disabilities in Kathmandu, Rama Dhakal also faced challenges of access, inability to walk long distances and the absence of a person to support her. She returned with an account, representative of the experiences of girls and women with disabilities in Nepal.

In addition to the challenges of social discrimination, these girls lacked scholarships and assistive devices such as canes or wheelchairs to help them access education and other basic services enjoyed by their peers.

“I was disabled as a child. My sister used to go to school through the forest and was raped by a group of boys; she couldn’t walk. After that my parents wouldn’t look at me the same, they imprisoned me in a dark room, would not give me food or allow me to go to school. They used to use bad words to speak to guests about me, refer to me as a burden and suggest that they take me somewhere else.”

“The government has many good policies in place but does not implement them”

From the Democratic Republic of Congo, Seraphine Kilongozi Musambi shared tales of sexual harassment experienced by women in professional and academic circles. She told the story of a woman she directly dealt with who found herself between a rock and a hard place when faced with sexual advances within the formal court system from which she sought justice.

“I was helping a woman going through a divorce; she wanted custody of her 4 children. During the hearing with the judge, whenever he asked the woman a question, he would insist, ‘are you sure you want these children?’ while also winking. After the hearing I learnt that the judge was trying to make advances to the woman and would call her every day. So she couldn’t say no because the success of her case was at stake.”

Monique Tumba Tshala discovered that the human rights violations experienced by LGBTI in the Democratic Republic of Congo reach further than social exclusion and discrimination but commonly included several justified-even celebrated-systematic expressions of violence against them. Here, she shares the story of Sylvia.

“When I was 16 and my father noticed I was part of the sexual minority he chose to take me back to the village for treatment. Two days after reaching the village, rituals were organized for my deliverance. A cock was brought, my legs were kicked, and two ladies took me to the river where they bathed me. I was taken to an abandoned hut to spend the night alone. In the middle of the night, a man raped me. I shouted but there was no one to come to my rescue. When the 2 ladies came, I cried and told them the story and they told me not to tell the story to others, because I had been delivered and would not return to my previous life.”

Our Challenges as Women Human Rights DefendersInstitute participants also shared their struggles as women human rights defenders (WHRDs), as well as the tribulations of their fellow associates.

Mary Conteh of Sierra Leone gave examples of WHRDs being called at odd hours and threatened by unidentified callers to stop their work. She told of women being defamed, called childless prostitutes and being openly and directly threatened by opinion leaders and community members. This is her story.

“A 12 year old girl was raped by a journalist. I was implementing a project on violence against women and when I intervened in this case, a press release was aired, insulting me, calling me half baked. I spoke to the head of the [catholic owned] radio station who did not help. The catholic community in my town is very powerful and so everyone dissociated themselves from me. I had to leave the community for 1 week. Upon return, the matter had cooled but I am still discriminated against. Human rights organizations set up by Catholics do not invite me or my group to activities. They are now using my husband who is afraid for my life to discourage me from doing my work, by offering me a job running a shop.”

While carrying out her research on the impact of food insecurity on the women of Nepal’s far western region, Pooja Bhattarai was also exposed to risks other WHRDs face in terms of their personal protection. She shared her experience;

“I was in the middle of the jungle, tired from walking for hours and it was the last day of my trip. I was relieved at the prospect of a bus ride and then found out I would have to walk four more hours. It was clear that I was tired. A bike came with two guys and my friends offered me to go with the bike. I didn’t think of the risk because I was very tired. Half an hour later they stopped in the middle of the jungle and claimed that the brakes were not working. I called my friends because I thought something was wrong and they might do something to me. Suddenly a man came out of the blue and asked what was wrong. I was relieved to see him.”

As Nazia Taj Abbasi spoke to WHRDs in Pakistan, she discovered that while they had achieved much and had a long list of reasons to celebrate, they were depressed, anxious and psychologically unstable. As she probed further, she came to the realization that these women defending others were also in dire need of defense since they had often suffered the same violations.

“Women human rights defenders were not feeling comfortable. They didn’t want to report themselves as victims of violence because they felt that it was a sign of weakness. Due to militant groups and talibanisation, the defenders were very afraid and asked that this information is kept confidential.”